Twas the Friday Before Christmas....A Christmas Poem

Twas the Friday before Christmas

And I woke up very late

I was feeling sleepy and grumpy

And so was my mate.

By waking up too late

I missed my spinning class

Which isn’t very good

I need to tone up my ass!

I pulled myself out of bed

Feeling and looking like shit

Went to the mirror

Where I saw a huge zit!

A big angry red spot

Where my neck meets my face

A very uncomfortable boil

On a very noticeable place!

The Party is tomorrow

What’s a girl to do?

And I’m also suffering from

A bloated sore tummy too!

A girl’s worst nightmare

This can’t be real!

Tomorrow I need to look like a prinnie

The spot must heal!

The boyfriend and I

Make our way to work

We then start fighting

Because he’s a selfish jerk!

I stomp out in tears

And throw a massive strop!

Pick up a packet of ciggies

From the corner shop

He texts me back

Says he’s sorry that’s he’s a jerk

I miss you baby

Please come back to work

I get back to a cuddle

And light one up.

Ready to tackle the rest of the day

And get some coffee in my cup.

The pressing matter is

This big angry spot

I can’t go to the party

I simply cannot!!!!

I look up remedies

Toothpaste and oil from a tree

What the fuck, I don’t think so

I ain’t putting that shit on me!!!

Steaming and a concealer

So many to try

I need to get it sorted

Or I’ll simply die!!!

So Ragers and Ragettes

I don’t know what to do

Help a sister out

What works best for you?

I need to get going

I feel such a fright

Happy Friday before Christmas to all

And to all a good night!!!!

Lots of Love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxx

On Christmas Party Dress Excitement

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!  It’s a chilly day today so I am wearing my fuchsia, orange, white and black striped shift dress, my black peplum jacket and my black knee high 5 inch stiletto boots.  Fabulous!

It’s only 8 days until Christmas and I have to admit, I am excited.  For Christmas?  Hell no!

In 3 days, it’s the work Christmas Party.  I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo excited for that!  Now remember I had my heart set on an ice blue dress and I found a gorgeous red dress?

Well, I finally received the red dress.   It was a bit of a trauma but I finally received it!  The company I bought the dress from decided to use a certain delivery company (which shall remain anonymous) that have a reputation for being quite unreliable.  I was scared that I was going to not get it in time.  I received a text the day after I ordered my dress saying that it was going to be delivered.  I was happy.

But it didn’t get delivered that day.  I received a text the following day saying that it was going to be delivered.  I got my hopes up and it didn’t arrive. 

No we were onto Saturday.  I put down the delivery point as work.  I checked the tracking and they said that it was out for delivery.   I wasn’t going to be there!!!  No dress that day too. 

Finally on Monday I received it.  And Ragers and Ragettes?  It was worth the wait!!! 

Every woman should have a dress that makes them feel like they are the most attractive woman in the world.  This is the dress.   It accentuates my curves, it’s a halterneck and so it shows my shoulders (with my workouts with my new personal trainer, my shoulders are looking amazing!!) it has a slit up to the thigh and paired with a gorgeous pair of Topshop golden sandals that I have, it’s poetry in motion!!! 

I plan on putting my black and gold envelope clutch, red and gold earrings and a red statement ring.  I am getting my hair, makeup and nails done on the Saturday.  So I am planning on going for red sparkly nails, gold eyeshadow and red sparkly lipstick.  Fabulous!!!  I’m thinking hairwise, going for a Jean Harlow look.  Old Hollywood glamour...love it!!

Getting ready to go out, for me, is more fun than actually going out!  I have a ritual. 

First I get my beauty treatments done.  Then I come back, get into the shower and once I am finished I put my cocoa butter on (this is a must have for every woman!!!!!   Put it on when you get out of the shower and when your skin is still damp...that’s how you get the best of it) and I put my big bathrobe on.

Then I go and pour myself a glass of wine and I start to get myself ready.  If I haven’t had my makeup done, I would do my makeup and then my hair.  I start with my eyes first.  Because if you are doing eyeshadow, little bits of eye shadow will drop on your cheeks and around your face.  If you have foundation on, it will mess it up.

I then prime my skin, the apply my foundation, conceallor and face powder.  I don’t tend to wear blush because I have a natural pink glow. 

I then do my hair.  As I have a standard bob hair cut, there isn’t a lot I can do.  So  I tend to just leave it sleek.  I dry it and straighten it.  I use mousse and volumising hair powder.

Then comes the best bit....putting on my outfit. 

Now when you have a big function, what you wear under your outfit is just as, or even more important than the actual dress.

The best invention is spanx or anyt sort of sucking in knickers.  I have4 different types!  I have some large sucking in pants, ones that are like shorts that are thigh slimming, a body suit that have straps that go over the shoulders and are bikini cut.  You can wear your own bra with it and I have another one that is similar but it has longer legs (down to the knees).

Then you need to think of the best bra for the outfit.  A strapless bra will do for my type of dress but there are some fabulous new types of bras out now.  There are stick on ones, tape that pulls your boobs up, a backless bra...the combinations are endless!!  For Saturday I am opting for a stock on bra with tape that pulls my boobs up and my sucking in bottoms with thigh slimming.  Fabulous!

So I am I so excited to get ready.  I don’t know or care what Simon is wearing.  I want to look like a goddess. 

I also want Simon to look at me the way he looks at his Mercedes.  I want to wow him.  And I think I will.

So the countdown begins....3 more days until I get to put the dress on and be a goddess for a bit.  But as my girl crush Elena taught me, goddess is a state of mind and in that case, I am defo a goddess!!!

Until next times, Ragers and Ragettes, keep your head and standards high and your heels even higher!

Lots of Love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxx

On Tempted by the Fruit of Another.....Christmas Dress...

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!  It is so cold outside!!!  Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!  I am rocking my favourite cream jumper, my ultra skinny jeans, brown knee high boots.  I have a thermal top under my jumper, thermal leggings under my jeans and thermal socks.  I am still cold!!!  My little space heater by my desk is on full blast!!!  My feet are so cold!!!

Well today, I ran into a massive quandary. 

As you know, received my ice blue dress yesterday for our Christmas Party.  I tried it on and it is a very sexy little number indeed!!!  Very beautiful.  I pulled my shoes and handbag out and gave the ensemble a twirl.  Gorgeous!!!

I came in today smiling and feeling quite happy.  Then I opened my emails and saw it....a certain boutique that I love to shop at sent an email with offers on Christmas dresses.  As I ate my breakfast, I thought that I would have a little look.

Then I saw it.  My mouth dropped open.   A beautiful red maxi dress with thigh split with gold chain halter neck straps....oh....my.....God!!!!

I clicked on it and I was blown away.  This frock was stunning!!!!  I zoomed in.  Absolute class!!!  I was in a tricky situation.

I have my beautiful ice blue frock with silver tiara and silver bling and then here is this stunner.  Red, slinky, classy and elegant.

I was being tempted by another dress!!!!

So I did what any self respecting girl would do.  I messaged Suzanne.

Suzanne has a very level head when it comes to these sorts of things.  She is always practical and I trust her 100% to give me the best advice.

So I told her and sent her the photo of the red dress.

She gave me the best advice.  She said get the red dress for the Christmas party and the ice blue one for New Years Eve.

Of course!!!!  Suzanne always gets it right!!!  Honestly!  So wear the ice blue frock for New Years and the red maxi glam dress for Christmas!!!  It makes perfect sense to me!!!

Now comes the important part....accessorizing the dress.

As it has a bit of bling on it so when it comes to accessorizing this, I am going to have to err on the side of caution.

So I am thinking.  Black peep toe heels, my black and gold clutch bag, earrings I have some red and gold ones and a red and gold cocktail ring. 

Should I put a tiara on?  I think that I should.  I mean, I can’t be the ice queen but I can be the Christmas prinnie?  

So many things to think about!!  Whatever happens I will look fabulous!!! 

So until next time Ragers and Ragettes, keep your head and standards high and your heels even higher!!!

Lots of Love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxx

On Simon's Ruined Birthday

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!!  Happy Monday indeed!!!  Brrrrrrrrrrrrr!!  It is absolutely freezing outside!!!  Today I would rather be cuddled up in my room on my bean bag (which is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo comfy), wrapped in a duvet with a hot chocolate and Netflix.  I finished watching a Danish show (and there was 1 Danish cock on display....my theory is totally correct!!  Danish men have huge dicks!!) but I found  few others to watch so it’s all good.  Anywho, I would rather be sitting in my room snuggled up watching Netflix.  It’s cold!  So today I am rocking a red sparkly jumper with my super skinny jeans, and my brown knee high boots with fleecy socks underneath.  I hate being cold!!!!

I received my Christmas Party dress today and it is absolutely gorgeous!!!!!!!  I am in love with this dress!!!!  I cannot wait to try it on and strut my stuff in it.

So on Friday was Simon’s birthday.  And I was feeling really positive.  We left work and drove to the flat, I got ready in record time and I looked fabulous!!!   I mean I look really fabulously fabulous!  I really liked the look!  Simon wore a nice shirt and his jeans and boots and he looked lovely.  When I strutted out he smiled and held me.  I breathed him in...there was no other place that I wanted to be.

I received a call and it was from his mum.  She slurred, dad is on the way to pick up.  Simon turned white.  His mum was drunk.....again...

I grabbed a bottle of bubbly from the fridge and some glasses.  I smiled and tried to keep him smiling but he looked on edge.

His dad picked us up and when we got in, his mum greeted us.  She was trashed!  She was wearing a blue backless lace dress with tights and heels.  Her makeup was done and she tried to cover the purple and redness in her skintone.  Betty!!!!  She said as she pulled me forward for a hug.  You look gorgeous and she put a big kiss on my cheek.  I smelled the booze.  Simon was frozen with a look of sheer terror, horror and embarrassment.  I didn’t know what to do.

She saw the bottle of bubbly in the bag I brought and she grabbed it and opened it.  I took it from her and poured 4 glasses.  We went out to their little cabin in the garden and sat down.  His mum said I will stay inside and wait for the guests. 

Simon was quiet.  I tried to talk and get the conversation going with his dad.  It was hard because there was such an atmosphere.

The rest of the guests arrived and my mama then called me.  I went out of the cabin and spoke to her.  I told her that Simon’s mum was drunk and that I hoped that she would sober up by the time she ate.

The guests all arrived and so did the cabs.  The first cab came and the work lads, Paddy and his brother popped in.  The next cab was for me, Simon, and his parents.  We got in and were on our way to the restaurant.  It was the longest 20 minutes of my life.  Simon’s mum kept on asking Simon what was wrong.  Simon was clenching his fists.  I kept the conversation going as best as I could.  When we were about 2 minutes away his mum asked are you ok again.  Simon snapped.  No I am not he said with a raised voice.

Luckily we pulled up to the restaurant.  I paid the driver and walked out with Simon behind me.  His mum stumbled behind me. 

We found our table and I went to get the drinks for Simon and I and to get away and think on how to defuse the situation.  I ordered our drinks and I turned and Simon’s parents were putting their coats on.  I looked at Simon and his dad approached me.  He put his arm around my waist and said, Betty we are leaving.  Simon has said that his mum as had too much to drink so we are going to go home.  My mouth hung open.  They walked out.  Simon walked up to me and I said are you ok?  He hugged me and I got his drinks. 

I told Simon what his dad told me.  He looked at me and said that didn’t happen.  I asked Mum to stop drinking for the rest of the night and she refused

The other guests started to come in.  I went through the meal on autopilot.  Smiled at the right time, laughed at the right jokes.  I had only 1 and a half glasses of red wine.

I texted his dad to ask how he was and his dad blamed Simon....How was this Simon’s fault?

As the evening went on, I started to think....what other special occasions has Simon’s parents ruined?  How many birthdays, school functions, parties, holidays....How could a mother choose alcohol over her son?

I grew more sad as I looked at him.  I had to stop myself from welling up.

When the night finished and we got home, Simon and I got into bed and he held me, his head on my chest.  I felt warm liquid on my chest and I looked down, Simon was crying.  I looked up at the ceiling trying to hold back my tears.  I ran my fingers through his hair.  Shhhhhhhhhhh, I soothed him.  It’s ok my darling.  He cried himself to sleep.

I didn’t sleep well that night.  I felt myself getting angrier and angrier.  I woke up at 7:30 and went to the gym and had a hell of a workout.  Anger really is a great motivation.

I received texts throughout the day from Simon’s dad saying that his Mum’s feelings are hurt, that he is spoiled and that they are not going to help out at work (which is a blessing, Simon’s mum is a hindrance plus they bring the dogs in and they cause issues.)  Proper emotional blackmail.   I didn’t tell Simon this as I didn’t want to add to the misery.

So here I stand after this strange weekend wondering where the future is going to go.  I will stand by Simon forever.  I love him.  But I know how much parents are important but his mum is clearly sick.  She needs help but won’t admit it.  How many more occasions will she ruin before she gets the hint?  If Simon and I get married, will she get trashed there and ruin our day? 

I don’t know what to do, Ragers and Ragettes.  I am sad, gutted, fuming and confused all in one.  This is a problem that is always going to be here unless help is sought out.  I just don’t know how to proceed. 

I guess that all I can do is stand by my man, love him and listen to him.  Wipe his tears away and be strong for him.  What else can I do?

Until next time Ragers and Ragettes, keep your head and standards high and your heels even higher.

Lots of Love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxxx

On Simon’s Birthday and a New Outfit Choice

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!!  It’s Friday!  I am so happy that it is!  I am rocking my skinny jeans, leopard print sheer blouse and my black peplum jacket with my black stiletto knee high boots.  It’s a cold and windy day in St Helens. The sort of day that I would rather be snuggled up in my duvet watching Netflix and eating M&M’s.

But today is an important day.  It’s my Simon’s 29^th birthday.  So I have been rushing around and trying to get everything ready for him. 

This morning he woke up to one of our guinea pigs near his face.  He loves the guinea pigs.  I gave him his card and he seemed happy with that.

We got to work and Errol got his presents that we hid in the back of his car. 

Simon is very difficult to buy presents for.  When he sees something he likes, he simply buys it.  So I had to really think outside the box.  So went onto a man gadget shop and purchased a gun that shoots elastic bands, a mini pool table and a calendar that has been signed by his favourite pin up girl. 

When he opened his presents he seemed quite pleased.  He played with the elastic band gun shooting the elastic bands at Keith and Errol.  He then played a quick game of pool.  He then pinned his new calendar to the wall, opening it to the centrefold. 

So far so good!

The big challenge is for tonight.  He doesn’t know where he is going so I am winding him up telling him that we are all going skiing.  We are all actually going to a gorgeous restaurant in a place called Hindley (which is 20 minutes away).

Now this has been a military like operation.  I have had to keep this secret.  So I have booked the taxi, the restaurant and organised with 9 men to get to a set place at a set time...

That doesn’t sound like much, but honestly, men are like children.  So I had to write everything down and basically draw them all a picture. 

And because this time of year, the restaurants are busy, I had to book the food for everyone (besides Simon’s, he will order tonight) and put a deposit down.  It was stressful but I did it!!!

So the plan for tonight is get to Simon’s parent’s house for 6ish.  Have some Prosecco, wait for the others to arrive then at 6:30, leave in the taxi to get to the restaurant for 7pm.  There, his best friend and her new boyfriend are meeting us (he doesn’t know this, another surprise for him).

The Restaurant was his best friend’s idea.  It’s called Summat to Ate (funny name, I know!) and it’s a cool looking restaurant with a great concept.  It’s a steak restaurant and you cook your steak at your seat!  It comes out on a hot volcanic rock and you leave it there for as long as you want!  It’s a man place.  The lads are all excited.

Then after we are going to get a taxi back to St Helens and have a few beers.  We are also meeting Andy in town.  Hopefully not a repeat of last work night out?

But the most important thing.....yes, Rager and Ragettes....my outfit!

I have decided to go outside my comfort zone.  As you know, whenever I go out, I usually wear a mini dress that is red, or a black jumpsuit.  But I decided to break these 2 rules! I want to get more jewel tones in my wardrobe (as the gorgeous Suzanne pointed out to me) so I decided to wear a pinky/peachy blazer over a cobalt blue plunging vest, ultra skinny jeans, my carvela peachy/pinky 6 inch stiletto Mary Jane styled heels with a leopard print clutch bag and the most blingtastic cocktail ring that I have ever seen!!!  Fabulous!  I am also rocking blue nails and tonight I am going to attempt cobalt blue eye shadow with pink lips.  It’s a far out look for me but I thought that I would try it.  You never know, I might be rocking this trend in the future!!! 

I don’t know if I am more excited about the actual celebration or if I am excited about getting ready to go out in my new outfit!! 

So fingers crossed it all goes to plan.  I want to give Simon the best birthday ever.  He deserves it.  A lot of time in work I see he gets stressed and upset.  I just want him to relax and chill and enjoy his special day.

So I raise my glass to you, Simon.  Thank you for loving me, for believing in me, for making me laugh, keeping me on my toes and for being a wonderful boyfriend.  We have our ups and downs.  Our little spats but we never go to be angry with each other.  That, to me, is the most important thing ever.  So Simon, enjoy your day and I hope to spend the next 29 years happily with you.

Until next time, Ragers and Ragettes, keep your head and standards high and your heels even higher!

Lots of love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxx

On Christmas Parties and Finding the Perfect Dress

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!!!  It’s a chilly day in St Helens so I have dressed accordingly.  I’m rocking a red sparkly belted jumper with my skinny jeans and my brown riding boots.  Now I have been wearing dresses this past week but today I have opted for jeans.  Why?  Because it is so cold here at work that I have to put a heater under my desk.  The heater has given me ugly looking marks on my leg so I can’t be having that.

I especially cannot be having that as it is coming up to that time of year that every girl loves and dreads....Christmas Party Season. 

Christmas Party Season is a bittersweet time.  Think crash diets to get into that frock, trying to find a frock that no one else has, booking beauty appointments (I booked mine in October!!), trying to get shoes and the right accessories for the frock, and so on!

Then onto the actual Christmas Party.  Christmas Parties are a hotbed for drama.  Many illicit kisses, bitch fights, sexual encounters and drunken mistakes are made.  Friendships break down and new ones are made.  Yes, so much drama in one night.

One such party, on this night, someone got fired, a romance happened (the happy couple got married this year) a promotion occurred and I got home in one piece with my boyfriend at the time.  It was a classic evening.  That night, I rocked a purple asymmetric frilled River Island frock, fishnet stockings and studded leather black stilettos and a rock chick side swept curly hairdo that at the time was a great idea.  Looking back....it probably wasn’t!!!

Well this year, this Christmas party should be pretty much drama free.   The lads at work, Paddy and his brother and Simon’s parents will be there.  As I will be the only chick there I need to rock a particularly fab outfit.

So I started hunting.  I usually go for a red short dress or a jumpsuit.  I needed something different though.

So I starting looking on Asos and I found 2 gorgeous frocks.  Both stunning and fabulous.  I looked at the price.  Ouch!  So I started to think outside of the box.

I started looking online at some quirky boutiques and after 5 hours of trawling the internet, I found it....

Now this frock is totally un-Betty Rage like but I chose it for one reason.

You all know how much I love my best friend Suzanne.  She is my constant inspiration, my rock.  She is one of the few people that I can be totally honest with and she will always give me her 100% honest opinion.  I consider her my sister. 

So when I saw this dress, I decided on it because it reminded me of Suzanne.  Suzanne is blond with blue eyes and clear porcelain skin.  This dress is falls to the knee, it has ¾ length sleeves, it cuts where a normal t-shirt would at the neck line, but it is backless!!!  And the colour?  Well, it is sequinned....and it is ice blue.  Yes, Betty Rage is breaking the red cycle and going for ice blue.  Suzanne wears blues all the time and I can imagine how gorgeous she would look in this dress.  It would suit her!!!  The fit and the colour....God, she would look stunning!

I decided to buy this dress and as I clicked on it I decided how to do the rest of the look.  I am going to go for a snow queen look.  So I will be wearing my silver sparkly stiletto shoes with matching clutch bag.  Some crystal chandelier serious bling earrings, and I found a statement cocktail ring.  That’s the outfit sorted.  I ran it by Suzanne and she agrees. 

I scheduled to get my beauty treatments done on the day of the party and one of the things I am going for is to get my eye makeup done.  Being a red lippy wearer, I am not confident doing my eyes.  So I need to get them to do a snow queen look for me.  I will probably slick my pink lip gloss on to finish the look.

It’s out of my comfort zone but I think that it will be fab! 

Simon and I decided to do a Man Versus Food sort of competition for our Christmas Party.  It's on December 20th at our Local Pub.  At our local pub, they do lovely food and 2 of the items that we do include a huge burger (it weighs about 2 pounds) and an 18 inch hot dog.  We are challenging the lads to eat them and the side of chips and onion rings.  If they finish it, Simon will pay for the whole meal.  It should be a laugh!!! 

I usually dread the holiday season because I have been single and alone.  But this year is different.  Life has changed so much for me so I feel that you sometimes need to go with it.  So here’s to ice blue dresses, eating competitions and fingers crossed a drama free Christmas party!!!

Until next time Ragers and Ragettes, keep your heads and standards high and your heels even higher!

Lots of love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxx

On a New Personal Trainer and Cleaning Out the Closet

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!!!   It’s Monday again and here I am at my desk with the heater under my desk blasting on full blast!  I am rocking my black and wine lace patterned vintage wrap around dress with black tights and my black patent with velour detailing stiletto Mary Janes.   I have my new favourite lippy on and I am feeling fab-u-lous!!

Suzanne is at home relaxing and getting better.  I am so happy that she is resting.  She needs it!!!  I do miss her though so much.  I need to schedule time to see her before Christmas and give her the Christmas present I bought her.  

This past weekend was a great weekend.  I woke up bright and early on Saturday as I had a training session with my new personal trainer.  Her name is Karen* (Changed to protect the innocent) and she is a very pretty girl.  With Blonde hair and her petite frame she looks like any normal pretty girl that you would see at the gym.  But this girl is seriously physically fit!!!  She has entered body form competitions and you should not under estimate this girl!!!!

We kind of started talking anyway before she started training me and it transpires that she went to school with Simon.  Simon remembers her as being quirt, pretty and sweet.  That’s pretty much Karen. 

We started the session with my measurements.   She measured my calf muscles first.  Now when I rolled my jogging bottoms up, she saw my defined calf muscles.  Christ, Betty she said.  You have got a pair of killer calf muscles!! 

I grinned and said, do you want to know my secret?  She looked at me and said yes I need to get mine better for my next competition. 

I smiled and said, I wear 5 inch stilettos most days.  I have been wearing heels for 17 years now so I can strut my stuff in most heeled shoes.  They shape the calf muscles nicely.

Karen was shocked.  She took the rest of my measurements and we started the training.  It was weights based (which is what I prefer and has been proven to work the best for fat loss) and I impressed her as I lifted more than she thought I could.  We chatted like friends would and it was a pleasant session.

She was asking me about my heels and the size that I wear.  I told her that I would send her a heel wearing training plan.  Result!

She said that she would send me a training plan (which she did) and recommended what I should eat.  I felt comfortable and confident leaving the gym.

When I got home, I took a shower and when I came out I had a friend request from her on Facebook and a text telling me that I did great on my session.  I had 2 trainers previous but I feel that working out with Karen will give me the results that I need.

I spent Saturday sorting through my clothes and clearing out what I wanted to list on eBay.  I got through a lot and it felt quite good.   I ended up with 43 items that I want to sell. 

I even went through my Facebook account and got rid of a lot of the bad things, people and feelings and negative vibes.

I then topped up my red hair (which I love so much!!!) so it's very, very, very bright red (thank you Crazy Colours!!)

I then settled in my bean bag chair and watched Swedish/Danish police drama The Bridge (God, Danish men!!!!  Daaammmmmnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!) and just felt content with things. I felt that finally things were moving in the right direction.

On Sunday I listed 12 items and within an hour 2 had bids against them!!  Result!  

A wise person once said, when you clear things and people out of your life, you are actually making room for better people and things.  So I like to think that I am getting rid of bad memories, negative feelings and negative influences. 

It’s so liberating!!!  I also found some lovely dresses at the back of the closet and realised that I haven’t worn my office dresses for ages.  So I am going to start wearing them again to work.  I need to get my femininity back.  

So I am going into this week feeling more positive and bright.   No doubt there will be times where I will want to snap and scream but the key is to remember that better things are coming and also remember never to let anyone make you feel inferior.

So Ragers and Ragettes, clean out your closet and make room for new things and new people.  I mean, do you really need an excuse to buy new shoes and clothes?

So until next time, keep your standards and heads high and your heels even higher

Lots of Love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxxxxx

On Going to Amsterdam

Happy Friday Ragers and Ragettes!!!!  I am in a great mood because it is Friday!!!  Whoop whoop!!!  I am rocking today a fuchsia, black and grey striped jumper dress with black leggings (I am honestly loving these things!!) and some black ballet pumps....yes you read that right.  I have reasons for wearing these today.  I am also wearing my new favourite lipstick.  It’s a deeper wine coloured red.  It’s a gorgeous colour!  I am so tempted to go out and buy at least 4 more tubes of it.

Good news also.  Suzanne is in the hospital but she is recovering.  I have been messaging her trying to keep her amused.  Please get better Suzanne!!!!! I miss you!!!  

I am also excited because in 10 weeks I am going to Amsterdam!!!!  I am beyond excited for this!!!

It all came about a month ago.  We were in work and I was chatting to the lads in despair about going home for Christmas.  Now I don’t mind going home for Christmas.  I get to see my parents but one thing I have learned is that when you live away from home as long as I have and then you go back to see your parents it can be...well.....erm......trying. 

My Mama is the worst.  If I have a glass of wine (she is tee total) instantly, are you an alcoholic?  For ages it has been why aren’t you married?  When are you going to have a child?  Stop piercing and tattooing your body.  Have you gained weight?  And the list goes on!!!

I was chatting to the lads about this and I said that I need a vacation from my break in America.  They said where would you go?  And I said some place like Amsterdam.  They all looked at me and it clicked.

I went to my desk and did some research.  And before I knew it I found flights and an apartment accommodates 10 people.   I told the lads excitedly and on payday we all booked it!  

And I am now beyond excited. 

Amsterdam is a great city.   Besides the culture, history, scenery , great vintage shops, and atmosphere, they have “coffee shops” that serve beer, coffee and marijuana.

Now let’s get something straight.  I am not a major pot smoker.  I have maybe smoked the stuff about 6 times in my 30 plus years of living.  It’s something that I can take or leave.  I am more of a cigarettes and alcohol sort of girl.  But when I go to Amsterdam, I plan on relaxing and indulging in the giggle weed.  I don’t plan on getting wrecked though.  Someone will need to be the responsible adult!!! 

I went to Amsterdam in 2011 with a hen party (bachelorette party to people in America) .  It was August and it was the best weekend I ever had.  The bride to be was a bridezilla and threw temper tantrums when she didn’t get her way.

I remember the Friday that we arrived.  It was a lovely, warm August morning.  We took the short flight (an hour and 20 minutes) and arrived.  The train station was in the airport.  We got the train to the city center (there is a train to the city center every 20 minutes) and when we got to Dam Square, the sun was bright and it was lovely and warm.  We checked into our hotel (just off Dam Square) and headed out into the city center to explore. 

We went to a cafe and the Bride’s sister bought some pot.  We rolled a joint and shared it.  It was relaxing.  We had a laugh especially when the bride’s mum came in and in her Irish accent said “ are ya sure that this is the best pot that you can get?  I don’t wantcha smoking somethin’ that is substandard.” 

We all giggled even more!!!  It was a laugh!!!  We then went roaming the streets of Amsterdam and were giggling about everything. 

Then the munchies hit.

I needed food and I needed it at that moment!!!  I then saw a sign that said “Best Chips in Amsterdam”.  It was in a blue and yellow cone shaped paper.   I knew I needed to try these chips.

I ordered a big cone of chips with garlic mayonnaise and cheese.  I was in heaven!!!!  They were the best chips I ever ate.  Ever!!!!

As the afternoon drew on we went to the shop bought some alcohol and just chilled.  We then got ready to go out.  All 8 of us went out together but 4 of us split away from the group.  We ended up going on our own adventure.  We went to a few bars.  Then we decided to go find a night club.  One of the girls was a professional dancer.  So we danced until they threw us out at 4am.  We then went across Dam square singing and laughing.

Such great memories.  It was a great time.  I don’t know if I just wanted to recreate the moment.  I am not that fresh faced girl that I was 3 years ago.  I am a different woman.  So many things have changed since then.  But I have always wanted to go back.

So, January 30^th – February 1^st, 10 of us are going to Amsterdam which looks like it will be an epic weekend. 

It’s basically everyone from work let loose.  We all agree that someone will get arrested, someone will sleep with a dodgy prostitute and no doubt someone will get so wastes that they will end up naked duct taped to a fence somewhere.  All I know is that it is going to be the best weekend ever!

Christmas?  Nah.  It will be great to see the family, but Amsterdam?  I can let my hair down, laugh and enjoy a great city with great company.  And that’s what I intend on doing!!!  It’s great to have something to look forward to. 

So until next time Ragers and Ragettes.  Keep your head and standards high and your heels even higher!

Lots of love,

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxx

On A Cathartic Weekend and Bathing Guinea Pigs

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!  It’s Monday and I am feeling good in myself!  Today I am wearing a beige knitted dress with black trim, black leggings (I am really loving these leggings!!) and my black heeled knee boots.  I touched up my hair so it is bright, bright red!  Fabulous!!!  I have my red lippy on and it matches my hair.  Feeling on top form!

But I need some prayers Ragers and Ragettes.  Suzanne isn’t doing too well.  It appears that she has a bad kidney infection and she is on her way to hospital as we speak.  I am scared for her and I want her to get better.

In light of this news, I am going to make myself happy and put positive vibes out there for her with today’s post.

This past weekend was lovely and interesting.

Saturday was busy!!  I went to the gym and had a great session with my Personal Trainer.  I am gutted because on Thursday she is leaving and moving onto another gym.   She is an amazing woman and I have learned so much from her.  She’s given me a new lease of life in my workouts.  I feel stronger and she has made me see my workouts in a different light. 

Then Simon picked me up and we headed to the train station to go to Wigan as I needed to return 2 dresses to H&M that I bought.  One was a big fuzzy jumper dress that was way too big!  I mean the armpits sagged down to my waist!!!  Plus it just didn’t suit me.  (it suited the skinny bitch model though!!!) and the other was a quirky cute dress.  I put it on and it just didn’t suit me at all.  It was a bit tight but the way that it was cut didn’t flatter my figure at all.  I was looking for a blazer to wear for Simon’s birthday celebration in 3 weeks time and I found a gorgeous peachy/pink one.  I found the last one in my size got my refund and Simon and I walked around Wigan laughing and joking about how many pie shops there were.  Honestly.  Every other shop was a pie shop!

We then got on the train and headed back into St Helens and I went to the little shopping mall to a little boutique that I like and purchased 2 tops to wear under the blazer because I couldn’t decide which colour.  The first one is a gorgeous wine racer back floaty sort of top.  And the other is a cobalt blue wraparound cami.  Both look great under the blazer and I can’t decide which one to go for.  Part of me is saying go for the cobalt blue one.  It’s different and striking, I think with my red hair. 

We then went to the pet shop to purchase some more Timothy hay for the guinea pigs and Simon pulled a little pink bottle off the shelf. 

Hey Betty, Simon said.  Hey what I responded.

He grinned his cheeky chappy grin and said let’s bathe the guinea pigs. 

Now Betty Rage has never bathed an animal before ever.   Where do I even start? 

I shrugged and said, ok let’s give it a go!  We finished our shopping and got back home.  I got into a nice hot shower and put on my raspberry colour sweater dress (I love sweater dresses!!!!!!) and my tan leggings (which are a tad too big for me!) and we cleaned the guinea pigs’ cage out and then decided to try and bathe them.

I read on the internet some tips and so we tried it.  We put a towel in the bottom of the bath (for traction for the little guinea pigs’ feet.) filled the bath with warm water.  We put Wally* (I even changed the guinea pigs names to protect them!!) in first as he is placid.  I held Chilli* on my lap to calm him down while his brother was being washed.  Wally let Simon pour water on his back and rub his little body with the guinea pig shampoo.  It was the cutest thing I have ever seen!!!!  I even videoed and took photos of it!  When he was finished with Wally, I handed him Chilli and I wrapped Wally up in a towel.  The little guy was shaking so I did my best to keep him warm. 

Chilli didn’t like the bath at all!  He ran around trying to avoid having water poured on him.  Simon picked him up and kissed his nose.  The site was too cute for words!!!  Honestly!   It was cute over load!

We towelled Chilli off and wrapped them both up to keep warm and dry them off.  We took them to the front room to watch some TV.  I was holding Wally and Simon was holding Chilli.

That moment was perfect, Ragers and Ragettes.  We were sitting there on the settee with our 2 little bundles of fluff holding hands.  Honestly, if I could take a moment and wrap it up in a box and put a bow on it.  So when times got bad, I could revisit it over and over again.

Now, Wally has a little habit that makes me angry.  He likes to pee on me.  Yes, you read that right!  I felt confident holding him in a towel because surely he would pee in the towel?  Wrong!!!!

I was holding Wally in the towel and his face was pointing towards my face.  He started to crawl up towards my face.  I thought that he wanted to give me kisses.  I felt a warm wet feeling on my jumper and on my chest. 

The little shit got out of the towel to pee on  me and then went back into the towel!!!  Simon thought that this was the funniest thing ever!!!  I was not impressed at all!!!! 

We decided to put the little guys back in their clean cage.  Simon couldn’t stop laughing.

Sunday was spent chilling.  I reluctantly went to the gym in the morning.  I came back and I just felt disconnected.  Simon and I cleaned the apartment from top to bottom.  We finished up and Simon decided to play his PlayStation.

So I decided to touch up my red (red does fade so quickly so I used Crazy Colours Fire to keep the red looking bright and vivid.  I do this every 10 days in between hair appointments.   It’s not a permanent colour so there is no peroxide or anything like that.) and I sat in my comfy chair and started watching the latest Danish/Swedish Noir TV program, The Bridge.  It’s a great show and you know how much I love Danish men!!!!

I got lost in that world for a few hours.  I then looked at the time and decided to make a batch of chilli for Simon and me.  I love making chilli.  I can’t cook but I do make a good batch of chilli. 

Simon and I had dinner, watched TV for a bit.  It was getting late so Simon and I started to get ready for bed.  I cleaned up the kitchen, brushed my teeth and put my night cream on and headed for bed. 

Simon checked his phone and I was reading up on the latest fashion trends,  I just felt like I was a bit lost.  Simon turned the light off and got into bed.

I held him and we snuggled me.  Betty, he said.  What’s up.

I started to talk to him.  I told him how I was feeling.  The feeling of being lost and sometimes isolated.  How I want better for myself. 

He listened, stroked my back and I felt safe.  I don’t even remember what I said but I felt like some of the pent up feelings I had were set free. 

When I was finished, he stroked my face and said, Betty you can always talk to me.  He kissed me softly and said let’s get to sleep.

I rolled over on my side, my back facing him, he spooned me and wrapped his arm around my waist and kissed my neck and my back.  I feel asleep for the first time in a long time with a huge smile on my face.

Sometimes with our partners, we feel like we need to hold things back.  The truth of the matter is that your partner is your friend too.  We need to remember that. 

So here I am typing this up as Simon is blasting and dancing around the office to Barry White’s “You’re my First, My Last and You’re My Everything”.  Yes.  My other half is silly and sweet.  Yes he can sometimes be a bit of an ass in work and sometimes he has a know it all attitude but he’s lovely and sweet.  He’s one of my closest friends and I am blessed to have found him.

This weekend it made me realise that I have being living in the past and it’s time for me to move forward.  So next weekend I will be doing a massive clean out! 

Lastly, Suzanne, I love you, I miss you.  Please get better.  Please.

So until next time Ragers and Ragettes, keep your head and standards high, and your heels even higher!

Lots of love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxxxxxxxx

On Work Night Outs Drama

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!  It’s a chilly Monday here in St Helens.  I am rocking a Raspberry jumper dress over my skinny jeans and comfy brown riding boots.  I am nice and cozy and warm!!!

Well, on Friday I had another birthday celebration.  This time it was with my colleagues from work.   Keith, Errol, Errol’s girlfriend,  Paddy and Paddy’s brother.

I dressed in a white and beige body con dress, nails and make up done up to the nines hair perfect.

Now work nights out are notorious for drama.  Usually someone cops off with someone else, people fall in love, someone gets trashed and throws up all over the place, etc.  It’s usually a good laugh and I tend to not drink as much because in the past I was usually the one causing the drama.  And Betty Rage doesn’t want or need any more drama right now!

Friday night had its fair share of drama.  It started off nice enough.  We were all in the pub laughing and having a drink…  Errol’s girlfriend, Brittany (name has been changed) and I started to chat and have a laugh.  We played pool and have a good laugh.

Then our new member of staff, Andy (name has been changed) showed up.  Andy, is about 50, has an arm full off tattoos.  He’s a tough guy and he’s our mechanic.  He’s a good guy.  I bought him a drink and we all continued to have a great time.

Then we decided to go to another bar down the road that was quite skanky.  We all rocked up with Brittany puking on the way.  Messy!!!

Keith and Paddy walked up to 2 girls and started chatting them up.  Simon and I started chatting to Andy.  He’s enjoying working with us, which ixs good because he’s a good worker.

Simon then wandered off somewhere leaving Andy and me.  I went to buy a diet coke (I alternate alcoholic with non alcoholic drinks)  It was loud and I felt an arm around my waist.  Before I knew it, I was pressed against Andy’s torso, he whispered in my ear chatting about work...I felt his hand tenderly rubbing the small of my back.  I instantly felt uncomfortable.  Where was Simon?

I made my excuses and went out to see Simon who was having a cigarette and laughing outside.  Keith saw me shiver and he gave me his coat. 

I took a cigarette and pretended to laugh and joke.  Andy came outside and lit up a cigarette.

I was overreacting, I told myself.  I smiled, relaxed and joined in the merriment.

I gave Keith back his coat and he and Paddy went back to the girls they were chatting up and Simon disappeared again.  I went inside to check on Brittany who was chatting to Paddy’s brother.  Simon and I shared a kiss.  Errol called Simon over and I was again alone.

 I went out to have another cigarette and in a blink of an eye Andy was outside with me having a cigarette.  He was looking at me funny.  I tried to make small talk.  I finished my cigarette and he put his arms around me once more.  He hugged me and told me he was happy working for Simon.  He kissed my bare shoulder and I knew that I wasn’t over reacting.  His hands rubbing up and down my back.  You’re cold, Betty. 

I felt a bit scared.  He is 6 foot tall and looks like he has been in prison for murder. I didn’t know what to do.  I was shaking half out of cold half out of fear.  What if Simon saw?

I smiled sweetly and said, I need to go to the bathroom.  So I broke away and went to the toilet and tried not to cry.  I mean, my eye makeup looked perfect!!!! 

I checked my phone.  It was getting late.  I composed myself and strutted back out.  Andy vanished.

Simon was laughing with Errol at the fact Keith and Paddy went with the 2 women they were chatting up.  I stayed by Simon’s side for the rest of the night.  We got thrown out of the bar as they were closing at 3.   We stumbled to the take away for a pizza and not once did I leave Simon’s side.  Simon was the drunkest I had ever seen him so he didn’t think anything was up.  I clung onto him and he was whispering pure filth into my ear.  Usually I would reciprocate but I still felt a bit upset.

We got a cab and got home.  I had to hold Simon up.  When the lift got to our floor I went to leave and Simon fell flat on his ass.  I had to pick him up (wearing 6 inch stiletto heels and trying to pick up a giggling drunken boyfriend is difficult!!!

We got in, I ate only a slice of pizza and Simon picked the toppings off and ate it like a naughty school boy.  He looked sweet and I smiled at him.  I washed my hands and we got into bed.  I turned the lights off.  Simon tried to have sex with me but in his intoxicated state he couldn’t rise to the occasion.

So he passed out and I drifted to sleep.

The next day I pretty much did nothing.  My tummy was feeling off.  Simon was feeling rough..  I spent the whole day by his side.   Hugging him and kissing him.  I felt clingy, needy, guilty.  Then Andy texted me.

My heart started pounding.  He wanted to know if I had a hangover.  I texted back, I am a bit rough but ok.

He then asked questions about the work’s trip to Amsterdam. 

I answered brightly and pretended nothing happened.  I just felt guilty. 

I know I am probably making a mountain out of a molehill.  I bet that I am getting worked up over nothing.  I bet that this is not as bad as I feel.  Why do I feel so bad? 

I haven’t told anyone about this, not even Suzanne.  Did I do something wrong?  Why do I feel guilty? 

I am struggling with all these emotions.  When I was single I would have lapped the attention up but now that I am with Simon, I just feel like it’s all wrong. 

The worst bit is coming into work today and Andy acting nonchalant about it.  I am putting it down to drunken behaviour.  That’s all it can be, can’t it?

So I made a decision.  I am off the booze for the foreseeable future.   I just don’t want that drama in my life.  I worked so hard to get a great guy and to get a good life.  Things aren’t perfect by any means but they are better.  I love Simon so much and I don’t want to lose him.

We will see how this goes.  Fingers crossed it goes according to plan!  

So until next time, Ragers and Ragettes.  Keep your heads and standards high and your heels even higher

Lots of Love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxxxxxx

On the “L” Word

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!!!  It’s a cool day here in St Helens and I am writing this in my warmest sweater dress and my brown heeled knee high boots that I love so much!!!  These boots are so comfy!  They have a leopard print liner in them and they make your feet and legs feel so warm.  And the plus side?  I can drive in them!!!!  Result!!!!  I rarely can drive in heels!

Well, today I need to discuss with you, Ragers and Ragettes the “L” word.  I am not talking Love, Lesbianism, or life.  No, something far more controversial..........Leggings.

Besides the Ugg Boot (which I despise), never has an article of clothing caused such a rift in the fashion world.   A lot of women do own a pair of leggings but this trend has never been for me.

Why?  Out of principle.  I saw this trend the first time in the 80's and this time round I see how girls were rocking them, usually wearing them as bottoms, paired with a crop top and the leggings being so thin  that you can see not only the person’s knickers and the pattern on the knickers but what they ate for dinner the night before.

Yuck! 

Also, being a lady with ample curves, I am scared that my legs will look like sausages and my large bum will look bigger than Nicki Minaj's.

But someone changed my mind.

On Saturday I went out with Simon’s Mum and I ended up having a lovely day!  We went shopping and I bought a few sweater dresses.  Wearing jeans is ok in winter but sometimes you just want to try something different. 

The problem though is that one would need something to cover the legs.  I love multi coloured tights and but I have a small problem.  I tend to snag them with my acrylics.  I have tried putting them on wearing gloves (I end up pinching my skin and snagging them anyway!) getting someone else to put them on (That just ends in Simon ripping them off and fucking me!!) and putting them on without my acrylic nails (That was the worst week of my life....I need my acrylic talons!!!).  So I was chatting to Simon’s mum about my plight over a glass of Chardonnay at my favourite wine bar in Manchester, The Hanging Ditch, and she said, Betty, have you considered leggings?  I almost spit out the pleasant glass of Chardonnay I was enjoying.

What? Leggings??????????????

I looked at her with shock and she smiled and said, come on, let’s get you some leggings.

I know most things about fashion and such but leggings are a forbidden and unchartered dark corner in the world of Betty Rage. 

Simon’s Mum and I headed to Primark and she started explaining to me about the best type of leggings to get.  They can’t have a lot of lycra in it because they will stretch and sag.  That makes sense.  She recommends that I go for cotton ones.  They are nicer and will not stretch out as much with wear and when you wash them they won't snag.  

I was shocked at how many types of leggings they do!!!  All different colours, shapes, sizes, materials.  They even do fleece lined ones!  They did sucking in ones which sound like a good idea.

So I picked out a tan pair, 2 black pairs and a black sucking in pair in my size and ran to the check out and bought them before I changed my mind.

Yesterday I decided to try them on so I picked out a black and white stripped sweater dress that I purchased at H&M on Saturday and I opted for the sucking in leggings, took a deep breath and put them on under my knee length sweater dress.

Ragers, Ragettes.  They were not bad at all!!!  I put my knee high black sexy stiletto boots on over them with ease,  Topped with my red lippy, I looked at myself and thought, foxy!  Simon saw me and said, sexy baby and he playfully slapped my ass.  Ok, so far so good.

I spent the day wearing them and my verdict? They are much stronger than tights.  They are comfy, and the sucking in ones did the job.  My tummy and hips looked smoother and better.  No one really noticed that they were leggings.  That was a good thing.  The only down side is that every once and awhile, like tights, you need to adjust them and pull them up.  Sucking in leggings under a monochrome sweater dress with sexy black knee high boots?  9 out of 10.  Fab!

Today I am wearing my tan cotton ones under my cream sweater dress.  These aren’t sucking in ones and they are not shiny and nice looking like the ones that I wore yesterday. They fit nicely under my boots and didn't bunch up. They are thicker than tights and quite comfy.  My dress is a little shorter today so I am a bit self conscious.  But I am also happy that I get to rock them with my new boots.  I strutted out of the gym this morning feeling different and slightly sexy but pulling the back of my sweater dress down.  Nice.

So my verdict on leggings? 

They are ok.  I am not going to start to wear them every day but they are a practical solution for the winter sweater dress and tights dilemma.   I just need to remember to wear them under long jumpers, midi dresses or smock dresses.  Plus if you put a sassy pair of knee high boots on , no one will know the difference!   Result!!!

So until next time Ragers and Ragettes, keep your head and standards high and your heels even higher!

Lots of love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxxxxxx

What Do You Do with a Drunken Mother?

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!!  Happy Halloween!!!!!  I hope that you are all fab today! I am rocking a sheer leopard print blouse paired with skinny jeans and my knee high brown stilettos boots.  My hair has some fierce volume today so I have pulled it back into a black head band.  My false eyelashes are still on and intact so my makeup is minimal.

 I am recovering from the first round of birthday celebrations.  The next round is happening this weekend.

Which brings me to my dilemma.

Simon’s mum wants to go out with me to celebrate my birthday for a “Mum and Daughter” day in Manchester for shopping (yippee!), lunch (yippee!!) and cocktails (oh dear).

She wants to hit Primark (for those Ragers and Ragettes that are not familiar with the UK shopping experience Primark, also known as Primani, is a cheap clothing store that you can buy some really trendy clothes for a really good price!  I personally want to go as I want to buy some lovely jumper dresses and quirky coloured tights.)  which is cool, Boots (not a shoe shop but a shop that you can purchase cosmetics and perfume) which is fab and have a wander around the shops.  I am fine with that.

Now comes the sticky part.  I am trying to cut my drinking down because of health purposes and I have a gorgeous dress to squeeze into next weekend for my third birthday celebration and also for Christmas.  I am aware of what excessive drinking does to one’s looks and waistline.

Simon’s mum, as you know, is an alcoholic.  The one thing I know about alcoholics is that when you are not drinking they get antsy and almost insulted.  I don’t want to cause issues with my boyfriend’s mum.  But I don’t want to come back pissed a fart.

I have consumed a lot of alcohol in my life.  I sometimes wonder what it has done to my body.  I carry weight on my tummy and looking at Simon's mum, she should be a slim size 10-12.  With the size of her tummy, she's a 16.

Did you know that a large glass of red wine has the same amount of calories as a chocolate donut?  Scary!!!!!!!!!

Alcohol damages your skin.  It gives you redness and broken blood vessels on your nose.   And your nose turns purple.  Simon's mum's nose has broken blood vessels and it's looking bulbous and purple.

She has given me a look into my future.  I like a drink but do I want to end up like that?  So I have made the conscious decision to cut my alcohol consumption down.  Not just for my health but for my looks.

Piggy backing from my post from yesterday, my colleague from back home, Jennifer (names changed, people!!!) has made me think a lot about myself and how I view the world.  I have said it once before, what you consume is a direct reflection of how your body looks and how you feel.  If you feel bad about yourself, you are more than likely going to eat badly.  If you feel good about yourself, then you are going to eat well and take care of your body.  So when I see Simon's mum I see someone who is sad, who has had a hard childhood (she doesn't talk about it) and I see someone that needs a detox and some counselling.

So what do I do tomorrow?  I am thinking that there are 3 tactics:

Tactic One:  the Go Along with it Girl Tactic.  Drink and make her feel comfortable.  After all, she might be my future mother-in-law?  Go along with her and have a few drinks.  Try not to get shit faced (try is a hopeful word) but will most likely end up being sick down my top and telling the world that I love them.

Tactic Two:  The Everything in Moderation Girl Tactic:  Have a few drinks but balance it out with water. Share a bottle of wine but take a bottle of water with you and take big gulps when you can.  Be responsible and cut yourself off after a certain number.  This might work the best.  I see the scenario panning out as me lifting his mum onto the train and acting as the responsible adult.

Tactic Three:  The Tee-Total Anti Drinking Nazi Girl:  Insist on not having a drink and taking the moral high ground.  This will most likely cause an argument and I will end up in bad books as being a "party pooper" or being up my own backside.  I could also argue that I am taking anti-biotics but that might get his mum to think that I am pregnant  (which I am not!!!!!) and that might cause a great deal more grief than I need right now!!!

I am looking at tactic two.  I think that will work the best because I will have to be the responsible adult and I have learned to be that recently.  To be honest, I think my years of going out and getting caned are over and done with.

So tomorrow, after my hard session with my new fitness instructor (who told me this morning that she handed her resignation in - totally gutted) I will be getting my Betty Rage Red hair redone and then off to Manchester for what looks like an interesting day out.  Fingers crossed that it all goes to plan.

So until next time Ragers and Ragettes!  Keep your heads and your standards high, and your heels even higher!

Lots of Love

Tha Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxx

On a Little Positivity Please??

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!  It’s a cool fall day in Merseyside.  I wish I was in bed snuggled into my duvet and watching Netflix (I found a new Danish/Swedish show that I need to watch!  You know how I feel about Danish men...yummy!!!) but I am in work today!

I am rocking a raspberry coloured top, skinny jeans and my knee high brown stiletto boots.  Those things are so comfy!!!!  they have a lovely leopard print extra soft lining inside so my toes are nice and warm.  Best boots ever!!!!

Well, recently through the wonders of social media I got back in touch with a girl that I used go to school with.  I didn’t really hang around her much and I only saw her in passing.  She was one of the popular crew that girls like me could never hang out with.  She was also the sort of girl the rumours always followed her (most of them untrue)

Anyway, when she friend requested me, it took me ages to accept.  I thought why should I be friends with a girl who I didn’t know?  But something told me to accept it.  So I did.

A week or so after I accepted her request she messaged me asking what was going on and how awesome it was that I was living where I was.

I was shocked that she even knew me!  So we started talking.  She has an 8 year old daughter who is beautiful (just like her), she is still tall and slender with a lovely smile and an even lovelier attitude.  I would normally hate a person like this.

But I can’t and I don’t.

This girl is one of the most positive people I have ever met.  Most of the time when I meet an overly positive person I want to instinctively punch them in the throat.   Most of the time, those overly peppy and positive people are usually the saddest people in the world.  (I know, I used to be one of them!)  But she radiates such a positive,natural, happy vibe!  It’s scary!  I know her kind words are true and heartfelt. 

Getting back in touch with her had made me look long and hard at myself as a person.  We are so quick to complain about our troubles.  We would rather bitch and moan about our troubles and bask in our misery than wake up, thank God that you are able to get up and greet the new day with wonder and happiness.

We laugh at the troubles of “celebrities” and gladly gossip around the water cooler about our colleague’s troubles, not out of concern or worry but out of gossip sakes.

Luckily I am not in that environment anymore.

But I have been feeling a bit down recently but speaking with my old school friend has given me something to think about.

I used to write my blessings down every day. All the little and good things that happened to me during the course of the day.  Things like, "I give thanks that I didn't tuck my skirt into my knickers again" (true story!) or I am grateful that I didn't get stuck in traffic on the way home.  Those little blessings that come our way each day.  I stopped doing that because I didn’t “have time”.  I am a believer that if something or someone is important to you, you will find time at all costs to spend on them/it.

I stopped writing my blessings awhile ago because I thought that I had it all sussed out.  I thought that I had the key to all happiness since I had Simon, my apartment, my guinea pigs, my friends.  Thinking of it, I have seen a massive difference since I stopped writing my blessings.  My life seems less fulfilled.  I feel down most days.  Exhausted, sad, and a feeling and sensation of being lost and alone in a crowd.

So I have brought my notebook in with me and I am going to sneak in when I can to write my blessings down.  It’s my little secret and I hope that will kick start my life back to where it should be and where I know it should be.  Being happy, healthy with a sense of purpose, laughing and enjoying each day without fear.  I know that it is there for me to take but it will take time and understanding to get back to being on top of my game.  I think that it is a case of I have (almost) everything I want and it's the fear factor of being happy and satisfied.  That's a battle I need to get through and I will by keeping people like my old school colleague in my life.

So Ragers and Ragettes, when you wake up, look out the window.  See the sky and the beautiful colours in the morning.  Smell the fresh autumn air.  Enjoy the day.  When you start to open your heart and your mind to the lovely things that are around you, lovely things start happening to you.

So until next time, Ragers and Ragettes, keep your head and standards high and your heels even higher!

Lots of love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxx

On A Betty Rage Birthday

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!  Well, today is my birthday.  Yes, I am approaching 35 but it’s all good.  So today I have decided to rock my black jumpsuit that I have paired with a red skinny belt, black peplum jacket, my red and black skull printed Iron Fist Shoes, my red earring, red Lulu Guinness Lip shaped ring and a new and gorgeous red lippy that I have discovered!  Fabulous!!

The birthday celebrations started on Saturday.  Simon took me out to Liverpool.  I rocked a black bodycon dress that had a beautiful purple floral pattern on it.  Suzanne (who always gets it right) put the purple idea in my head.  She said that with purple you need to be careful because it can age you.  I never really wear much purple but Suzanne also pointed out that with my gorgeous red hair I can go for jewel tones so my vows for this year of my life, try other colours besides my iconic red.

Simon’s father drove us to Liverpool and his mum was sitting next to me.  She had a few drinks before obviously.  She was pawing me and slurring, oh Betty you look amazing!  Simon apologised to me when we exited the car.  We had a lovely meal at the prestigious Blue Bar and went to the Comedy Club.  We got fabulous seats (right next to the stage) and the comedian who was introducing the acts picked on Simon.  He told Simon that I was a beautiful woman and that he needed to propose to me.  We had a laugh about it.

We were sitting next to 2 girls and it turned out that they were a couple.  And the girl sitting next to me proposed to her girlfriend.  The comedy club gave the girls a bottle of champagne to celebrate.

After the comedy show, Simon and I started talking to the couple and we ended up chatting and sharing the bottle of champagne.  We had a laugh and soon before you know it we were stumbling back to their hotel to make sure that they got there ok.  As soon as we got into their hotel, there were a group of drunk and rowdy Dutch football fans. We stayed near them at all times and did our best to keep them safe.  He got them back to their room and at this point I just wanted to go home.  Simon checked his watch, 3:30am!!!!

We said our goodbyes and got a cab home.

I didn’t sleep the best and didn’t feel the best the next day!!! 

Then we met Simon’s parents for lunch.  I rocked a pair of bootcut jeans, a sparkly halter neck, cowboy boots and a black blazer. 

When we got to the pub his parents were there and a saw an empty wine bottle and a halfway drunk one.  Simon rolled his eyes.  We sat down and his mum presented me with a bag with a card.  I opened the bag and inside was a little box.  I opened the box and inside was a gorgeous necklace.  The pendant was shaped like a heart and inside were real flowers.  It has a delicate silver chain.  Then I opened the other parcel and inside was a butterfly with diamantes on it.  It was a little tray to put jewellery on.  They were lovely gifts.  I hugged both of Simon’s parents.

We ordered food and it took ages for it to come. But it was a lovely afternoon.

This morning I got up and Simon presented me with a present that I already knew that I was going to get.  I wanted a nice comfy lounging chair so when I read a book or watch Netflix I will be comfy so he bought me a massive red beanbag chair!  It was a lovely present and it’s so comfy!!!! 

Simon told me to dress up nicely and not bother preparing dinner tonight so hence my outfit today.  when I got to work, Errol presented me a bottle of wine and the lads wrote me a birthday card.  So here I am feeling blessed that I have good friends and good people around me. 

Plus I received a dress today that I bought for myself for a birthday present.  I am having another birthday celebration on November 7^th and I bought a little red dress that is smoking hot!!!  Honestly, it’s stunning!!!!  I can’t wait to wear it.  But I am going to be hitting the gym and eating perfectly to ensure that my curves look great in this dress. 

So, yes, my birthday has been good.  Growing older is scary though.  The grey hairs are the worst (I bought a fabulous product, Crazy Colours, to top my hair colour up and my hair is vibrant has hell!!  It’s fabulous!!!) .  I am lucky because I have good skin and there aren’t any lines around my eyes.  I look ok for my age. 

I am ok with growing older, it’s just that some thoughts go through my head.

The past year has been trying and hard, but I have somehow got through it all without breaking nail!  I always make promises to myself about what I want for the next year of my life.  I want to continue with my healthy eating, I want to be nicer to myself.  I want to take care of myself a lot better.  These are things that I have said before but each day with stresses from work and life, taking care of your body and mind gets put on the back burner.  It’s a sad thing.   

So here I am ready to go waiting for Simon to finish and let’s see what he has in store for me tonight.

Until next time Ragers and Ragettes, keep your heads and standards high and your heels higher!

Lots of Love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxxxxxxx

On Mental Health

Hey Ragers and Ragettes!!!!  I am soooooooooooooooo sorry for the length of time that I have posted.  It’s been a crazy, busy few weeks for me.

Today, I am rocking a long turquoise jumper with a white camisole, skinny jeans and brown knee high riding boots.

This is a post that I have wanted to write for ages.  I have started writing it but quickly have deleted it.  This post for me is on an issue that is dear to my heart because I, Betty Rage, suffer with mental health issues.

I was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder when I was 16 when I was caught stealing from my job.  The police couldn’t understand why a straight A student from a good family would want to steal.  So the court sentenced me to 100 hours of community service plus therapy.

Back in the 90’s when I was diagnosed, the doctors were not interested in why I felt the way I did, they just wanted to shut me up so they prescribed me anti-depressants that made me feel  like a zombie. 

The first batch they put me on made me sleepy and gain weight.  I couldn’t laugh, cry, or feel like a real woman.  So how did they remedy this?  They prescribed an additional pill to take the side effects away from the first pill.

Then the therapy.  That was a joke.  My therapist got it into my head because my parents spanked me that I was an “abused” child.  This seed got planted into my head and germinated into more destructive behaviour.  This woman effectively put me against the very people that loved me, cared for me, that had my back.  I became even worse, behaviour wise.

Then they decided to change my meds.  They gave me good old Prozac.   I continued in a zombie state and unleashed another side effect:  OCD. 

I started to micromanage my life.  I became obsessed with exercise and losing weight.  I went to the gym every morning.  That then turned into going to the gym twice a day 3 times a week.  Then twice a day 5 days a week.  Before I knew it, every spare minute, I was pounding it outside running 6 miles, 10 miles.  One day I ran 16 miles in the hot Ohio sun. 

Then I started to nit-pick at my diet.  I remember going 3 days without food and still punishing my body with the exercising.  It was around Easter time and I justified it that I was fasting for religious reasons.   I wasn’t religious.

My dad snapped me out of this behaviour very quickly.  My dosage of Prozac was decreased.

I then decided, when I left my home, that I was going to stop the medication.

I was in this strange new country unmedicated.  I was like a kid in a sweet shop.  I drank so much alcohol, fucked, and didn’t sleep much.  I gained so much weight, 5 stone (70 pounds)  And since then I have not shifted it.  (I am trying to)

When I moved to Ireland in 2005, I decided to try to go back in to therapy.  I found a lovely counsellor who fully listened to me.  She  hugged me when I cried, laughed with me, let me call her at all hours when I wasn’t feeling right.  She taught me that I didn’t need medication.  I just needed someone to care and listen to me.

I stopped seeing her because I thought I knew best.

I moved to the UK with Dan and he subjected me to emotional abuse and neglect.   I was getting bullied at work and at home and I truly felt that I didn’t have anyone to run to.  I considered throwing myself off the Centenary Bridge in Trafford Business Park as a way out.  I was desperate.

I left Dan, moved to Manchester and moved in with my psycho ex-roommate.  I decided to go to the doctor and reach out for help.

They asked if I would consider medication.  I stupidly said yes.  They put me on a pill that I had to take before bed.  They said that it would make me drowsy.  I slept like the dead.

The next morning, I woke up feeling like I was trapped in a fuzzy cloud.  I staggered to the gym.  The lady behind the desk said, go away, you’re drunk.  I was shocked.

I walked around Eccles trying to wake myself up.  I didn’t work.  I was slurring my words, I couldn’t walk in a straight line.

So I stopped medication.   And I started to educate myself. 

I read up on how diet and exercise can help you mentally.  So I started to exercise again and diet and the OCD came back. 

I would wake up at 5:38 (exactly without an alarm) walk a mile to the gym, work out, change and walk 2 miles to work.  I lived on pitta bread with burger in it.  That’s it.  I lost weight but started to grow fine hair on my cheeks near my ear, my fine hair started to fall out.  I was clearly a mess.  I was taking it to an extreme.

I left my job, got a new one and the pattern continued for the last 3 years.  Bad romantic situations, weight gain, feelings of low self worth. 

And the reason why I am telling you all this?  I have recognized the  signs, and through my experiences I can control these emotions and feelings a lot better.

When I am on a low, I tend to hide myself away.  My reasoning?  I don’t want to be a burden to anyone at all.  I am a believer (from experience) that 80% of people don’t care about your problems and 20% are happy that you have them in the first place.  So, like a turtle, I go into my shell and cry.  I try and work it out.  So I become quiet and withdrawn.

When I am on a high, it’s worse.  I run around 1000 miles an hour trying to fix everything.  I talk faster, I feel jittery and like a robot almost.  I am at my most dangerous then.  I overspend, make promises I can’t keep, I am also at my most creative.  I write music, poetry and essays.  It’s scary.  I understand why they say that there is a fine line between genius and madness.

So, the last few weeks I have been on a low.  I haven’t spoken much to Suzanne because I don’t want to bring her down.   And I have been snippy with Simon.  He’s tolerated me (I don’t know how he doesn’t know about my condition) and deserves a gold medal.

Today?  My feelings are on the up.  I am going into an in between phase, almost levelled out.  I feel almost normal, a bit fragile.  It’s scary but I am handling it fine.

I would like to speak to someone though.  So I am looking into that.

Ragers and Ragettes.  Mental  illness seems to be a dirty word.   People think that if you are depressed, bipolar are basket cases or mental. 

Guess what.  We are normal human beings.  We laugh, cry, smile, and feel pain like everyone else.  We feel things deeply and hard.  It really is. 

So I have signed up to volunteer at a local mental health charity to reach out in the community to help those like myself.  Who don’t know what or how to feel.  If I can offer comfort, help and direction to someone that needs it, then it’s all worth it. 

Anyway, this has been a hard post to write.  If anyone who suffers in the same way I feel , please feel free to contact me on bettyrage2014@gmail.com.  If I can help I will. 

Untilk next time Ragers and Ragettes, keep your heads and standards high and your heels higher.

Lots of love

The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxxxxxxx