Hey Ragers and Ragettes!!
It's a very warm day here in the Northwest of England! Thank heavens I had a full pedicure done!!!! I can wear sandals and wedges with confidence now! Trust me my toes were a right state!
Have you ever found that when you have wanted something for such a long time and you finally get it there is the initial excitement. Then after a month or so, you get a bit of a come down. That's kind of what I am feeling now.
Well, here we are. I've moved out. I've split up from Simon. In fact it has been 20 days since I last spoke to him. This is a good thing. I am letting go. Slowly but I am letting go.
I am in my new home. Now what? I have asked myself this for the last few weeks.
I don't like the fact that I keep looking back. The only reason why one should look back is to see how far they have come. And I have!!!
I have a lovely apartment that is quiet, safe and in this hot weather the trees shade my side of the building so I don't sweat at night. It's lovely and cool. I have my own parking place so I can stay late at work without having to worry about getting a parking space.
I am losing weight again. 7 pounds in 2 weeks. I am eating so healthily. I haven't really been exercising but Suzanne and I have been going to parks recently. This Saturday we are checking one out close to home. I've been to this park. Its beautiful and has a cool vibe and history about it.
Mr Wonderful has been.....well.....wonderful! He's coming over the first weekend in August for a visit. He's lovely but as I told Suzanne once, nice fairytale sex is great but sometimes a girl just wants to be shoved against a wall or bent over and slammed over a table and just fucked. Us girls are strange aren't we?
But I look at my life now and I see how it is. I compare it to how it was 4 months back, I'd take this in a heartbeat!!!
The funny thing is now I am settling in and I am trying to remember how to live again. I started reading the posts from when I started this blog. God, I have become boring!!!
But in this state of boringness, something interesting has happened....People have come out of the woodwork. More interestingly, men.
When I started this blog, I was dating around. And would you know some of the men that I dated are still single.
I started talking to a few of them and all I have to say is thank God I didn't go there!!!
I have had some interesting ones contact me.
The smiler. He is harmless. He is a bit tapped in the head as in I don't think that he is all there mentally. He's a lovely person but.....ermmmm...I need someone who is more savvy, shall we say...
Then the guy who gave me the perfect first date contacted me. Our first date was romantic, perfect, sweet, and amazing. We laughed and had a great time. The second date he arrived completely shitfaced and proposed to me in front of a packed pub....ermmmmmmmm..............no. He wants to meet up for a drink. Pass!
Ahhhh then the shit Christian Grey. Yes. This one is an interesting one. He drives a nice car, dresses and smells lovely. He looks like a gentleman. Dresses like one. Has the smile of a used car sales man though. When you talk to him, its all sex. Sex, sex and nothing else. But he obviously read 50 Shades of Grey and interpreted it very badly. He talks the talk indeed. When we met for a first date he was charming. But when we got in his Range Rover, it turned weird. He got rough. He pulled my hair very hard (which I hate!! And especially now with my beautiful hair extensions in!!) and tried to make me suck his pathetically small dick.
So money can buy you a lovely car but it can't buy you a personality, manners and if you are trying to be Christian Grey first thing's first, know your shit. If you're into that and I ask about stuff that is in regards to BDSM, don't speak to me like I am a freak. You're the one that clearly has women issues.....and if you have to constantly tell me you're a good man, you probably aren't..
I'm at an age where I think I want to settle down but I want it to be with the right man. Mr Wonderful is great. He treats me well. He's in another country and not strong enough. I need a man that will put me in my place (but not like the shit Christian Grey) I need a man that will be a man. Not just buy me off with fancy shit. I want to be with a man that we can be a power couple.
I look at my boss. She's an awesomely stylish and beautiful woman. She is married to a man who is strong, opinionated, rough but they love each other. You can tell. When we are in the weekly management meeting, you can see him looking at her with that look. You know....the I am in absolute admiration look. The look that says I love you. I respect you. The look that says when we get home I am going to so take you. That's what I want.
I want someone who will respect me for my ambition and quirkiness but will also be a proper man. Not one of these man bun wearing, kale juice drinking weirdos that are out there now. I am old fashioned. I like a man to be a man.
Is Mr Wonderful the man for me? I have no clue. He's lovely but he's missing that.........piece.
I stand in optimism. Mr Right is out there. He is out there and he is waiting to meet me. And when we finally come together it will be electric!!
But for the time being, I will enjoy my time with Mr Wonderful. I will enjoy the fairytale sex. The hand holding, kisses and cuddles. We will go out at night dressed to the nines. I will put my 5 inch stiletto heels on again. I will relish in feeling and looking like a lady.
This is part of the journey and I am ok with that.
So until next time, Ragers and Ragettes. Keep your head and standards high and your heels even higher.
Lots of love
The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxx
