Hey Ragers and Ragettes!
Sorry for the lack of posting, the last few days have
been....well....eventful!
Simon and I have found a lovely apartment and we are moving
in this week! Eeeeekkkk!!! So massive changes!!!
As each day goes by, I am learning more about Simon and his
family and his life. Simon is such a
strong person. For as I have found, he
has a very big cross to bear.
On Friday, he broke down and revealed that his mother is in
fact, an alcoholic. His father also
appears to be going down that road too.
He told me how he felt like he had to be the parent to his
parents. He told me that when his mum
got done for drinking and driving and was banned driving for 2 years how he
tried to protect her by pouring vodka into a glass and saying that she had the
drink when she got home. He also said
that he didn’t want to lose me because of his parent’s actions.
My heart instantly went out to him. I felt angry at his parents for putting him
through this. Simon isn’t a heavy
drinker at all. I instantly started to
look at my drinking habits.
I like a glass of red wine each night with my meal, I must
admit. But I think also maybe drink a
bit too much.
When I left my home and ventured out in the big world by
myself, I started to properly drink. I would get bladdered and wake up the next
day strangely hangover free. So I continued to drink. I would get mercilessly slaughtered and soon
my weight began to balloon.
I have wondered about my drinking habits. I know that drinking is bad for you but I do
like a glass of red wine. There is
something really sophisticated about after a hard days work, coming home,
making a nice meal, like a stirfry or chicken and veggies and pouring a glass
of red. You see it on TV and it looks
so, well, posh.
But seeing what his parent’s drinking habits are doing to
him, it hurts me. I am falling in love
with this guy and I adore him. And if I
had to choose the drink or him, Simon would win every day of the week. But the question is, why don’t his parents
see it the same?
My dad likes a glass of wine or a beer with his dinner, but
it’s just one. And my mama is tee total
(too many calories!) so this was never a problem that I ever had to think
about.
Last night for example was so uncomfortable. I went and watched the final football match
with Dan and Dan dropped me off at Simon’s parent’s home. Simon invited Dan in for a drink and his
parents were already on it. When I got
through the door a glass of red was handed to me straight away. I had a few at the pub so I was a bit merry I
took the glass, I have to admit, rather reluctantly. Dan stayed for an hour or so. And then he headed off.
When he left, his mum started severely slurring her
words. And when Simon would talk she’d
look at me and slur, “You’re a beautiful girl” and kiss me. Simon would get so irate. This happened a few times and then Simon
exploded. His mum whimpered and his dad
barked at her to shut up.
Me? I for one was
lost for words. So I said the first
thing that came to mind. “Erm, I want a
glass of water. Does anyone want one
also?
I got up and Simon followed me. When I got to the kitchen, he took my arm and
looked into my eyes. His eyes were
welling up with tears. Mine did
too. I felt hurt for him. I hugged him and told him that it was
ok. I didn’t think anything less of
him. I asked if I did the right thing and he said
me getting up and changing the subject was the best thing as his mum will
forget it the next day. I told him no
more drink for me tonight or for the rest of the week.
His mum came in to serve dinner. It was a lovely Greek dish. Simon wanted to grab the food and go to his
den. His mum said the Tzaki was in the
dining room. When I walked into the
dining room for the tzaki, I saw the table was fully set with salad, feta
cheese and olives. I felt bad. I mean really bad. I looked at Simon and his mum and dad and
said, why don’t we eat at the dining room table?
Growing up, my family always ate around the dining room
table together. I wanted to have that
sense of normalcy that I had growing up.
I always remembered my dad putting olive oil and balsamic vinegar on the
salad and serving it to us. And Mama
dishing up the dinner. We’d always say
grace before eating. And then we would
tuck in.
I wanted to give Simon that normalcy. We didn’t pray but I
tried to have a normal conversation with him and his family. I complimented his mum on her cooking. It was really good. I tried to make the conversation flow. His dad was drunk but not as bad as his
mum. It was hard. But I think I managed to make it work.
When dinner was finished, his mum served me Greek Yogurt and
honey. We went into Simon’s den. When he shut the door, he wrapped his arms
around me. I held him and he cried. He rested his head on my shoulder and I felt
his tears seep into my shirt. I stroked
his hair and soothed him as best as I could.
We sat down and watched some TV. My mama facetimed me and Simon’s face lit
up. My mama said hi to him and he waved
and spoke to her. Once she hung up he
looked at me and said, I love your mum.
She’s what a mum should be. My heart sunk.
Sigh. You see, Ragers
and Ragettes, when you take a man or a woman on in a relationship, you take on
their family. Simon will be taking on my
crazy Mama, my laid back Dad, my insane sister and nice brother in-law.
I will be taking on an alcoholic mother and a semi-alcoholic
dad.
But you know what?
That’s ok. That’s what love is
about. You have bad times and you have
great times. It’s how you take on those
times that count. I have done my best to
stand by Simon at all costs. He’s not a
mess. He’s a good man and so what, his
family has some baggage. Whose family
doesn’t?
But those issues will soon be old news because on Thursday
we get the keys to our new home and I will take him away from that. We will have stability and I promise, Dear
Simon, that I will always choose you over the drink. I won’t make those mistakes and I will take
care of you, love you, protect you and make you happy always.
Until next time, Ragers and Ragettes, please stay fabulous!!
Lots of Love
Betty Rage xxxxxx
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