Friday, 19 December 2014

Twas the Friday Before Christmas....A Christmas Poem

Twas the Friday before Christmas
And I woke up very late
I was feeling sleepy and grumpy
And so was my mate.

By waking up too late
I missed my spinning class
Which isn’t very good
I need to tone up my ass!

I pulled myself out of bed
Feeling and looking like shit
Went to the mirror
Where I saw a huge zit!

A big angry red spot
Where my neck meets my face
A very uncomfortable boil
On a very noticeable place!

The Party is tomorrow
What’s a girl to do?
And I’m also suffering from
A bloated sore tummy too!

A girl’s worst nightmare
This can’t be real!
Tomorrow I need to look like a prinnie
The spot must heal!

The boyfriend and I
Make our way to work
We then start fighting
Because he’s a selfish jerk!

I stomp out in tears
And throw a massive strop!
Pick up a packet of ciggies
From the corner shop

He texts me back
Says he’s sorry that’s he’s a jerk
I miss you baby
Please come back to work

I get back to a cuddle
And light one up.
Ready to tackle the rest of the day
And get some coffee in my cup.

The pressing matter is
This big angry spot
I can’t go to the party
I simply cannot!!!!

I look up remedies
Toothpaste and oil from a tree
What the fuck, I don’t think so
I ain’t putting that shit on me!!!

Steaming and a concealer
So many to try
I need to get it sorted
Or I’ll simply die!!!

So Ragers and Ragettes
I don’t know what to do
Help a sister out
What works best for you?

I need to get going
I feel such a fright
Happy Friday before Christmas to all
And to all a good night!!!!

Lots of Love


The Fabulous Betty Rage xxxxxx

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